FFS.
hjtgfjsdhsdsfdgkskejghkfjshgkjheakhehgfkjsehgehrjgh
fuck off.

today has been well nice (:
Kirsty and Cait came over for abizzle,
we cooked pastaa
(:
went to teh shoppeh
sat in the park til this little boy kicked us out of the house thing
rude much
we went to sainsburys to visit jay (:
then i went to get a library card cos im hard like, but i needed prove of identification
like wtf
seriously
for a library card ^o)
people these dayss

but yeh
this week has been amazing
like, living at tillys
haha
(:
love her so much
she really is my angel girl
^^
we argued last night
we were both in proper tears, like cant breathe crying
):
gah.
cherryadee (; and us two crying our hearts out at Green Street, and falling in love with Adam in The Perfect Man hes so amazeee

&just as i thought i was like, getting over him, turns out im not
hate this
i really do
why do i always have to think about him ):
its so stupid
i just need something to make me move on
like officialy
but i dont know what
):


mood kinda meh like,
im tiredd,
and i dont know what to do anymore
what to say to make things ok again
actually wish i could just go back in time
and maybe avoid letting him even come into my life
then id be ok
uhuh.

i wanna go for a walkk.
x

ok moods crashed.
asdfghjkl;
i give up
im never good enough
ever
it just seems that everything i do i mess up, every friendship i have i ruin, and every relationship i have i break up.
why do i have to make it so hard for myself to be happy.
surely i deserve it as much as the next person.
obviously not.
everytime i get close to someone i push them away
i make everyone pissed off at me.
haha my 'happy' spells dont last long these days.
*gives up*
again.
yessum.
hmm.
gah.
):

I'm in such a great mood, and i dont know why
I'm listening to a great song (thanks to James), chatting to the people i love (: , and sining my heart out.
haha.
i miss joe though ): i do love that boy
im thirstyyy but only water to drink, im not a bloody fishh. i need squashhh.
weathers a tad crappy atm, this morning it was beautiful and clear blue skiess, but no, stupid england, i dont think it knows the meaning of 'summer'
ive been home doing nothing all day
and im bored out of my mind.
i went to the shop though for some munch
on the way home i realised how different i am now from when i was little.
i remembered walking down lucombe road on the way home from school and seeing all the flowers and actually appriciating them, and i used to love spending time with my family, so much.
and then me and Emma got chatting about how we used to pass things through the fence at the end of our gardens, we are blates the oolest people cos we share the same birthdayy haha (:

but yes, im in such an amaze mood (:
life is good atm (:

&& 25 days til gym class heroess :D:D:D:D:D:D
eeeek.

seriously.
gah.
well, i didnt really expect to be asleep by now, my sleep pattern is kinda fucked atm.
i need to get my life organised.
get a job,
sort out my head,
get over him,
be more positive.
i need to do all that this summer so i can be better for college, which i am dreading.
taster day on monday, shitting myself ): gah
haha im scared of so many things,
i shouldnt be laughing, not funny i spose.
this film 'fallen' is weird /:
sorry no capitals tonight, im on pda and i just cbf, basically.

prom friday was awesome, (:
nuff said (:

i love my mum so much, she really is amaze (:


but yes, my hand hurts,
so ttys.
xXx

I love her soso much
it was great to spend time with them all again.
:)
was a really nice night (y)
2 pimps,
1 fairy,
1 princess,
1 devil,
& 1 indian.
fucking yes mayte.
(y)

been thinking a lot lately.
and i really dont like itttt.
:(
i need ryan to talk to.
the old ryan.
cos the new ryan doesnt understand me anymore.
hmm.
spose its best off all kept in my head anyway.
:(
im such an idiot, i really am.

hmm anyway.
Jess' party tonight.
Indian again.
like Pocahontas Indian not Asian Indian.
just by the way.
hmm
hope its ok.
i dont wanna be like all meh cos i have crap on my mind.
i hate this.
anyway.
yeh.
au revior.
x